God is wise
As I was writing in http://biblereflections.blogspot.com on the importance of repentence I started to talk about Bolivia...it hadn´t been my intention and in a way I felt it kind of distracted my audience from the place where I had originally wanted to take it.
But I wrote what I wrote and that be it...
I hardly speak of Bolivia now. People expect me to tell all kinds of adventures and things...I am quiet. Too much pain linked to Bolivia.
Not personal pain...I think of "my" people. The people of Bolivia.
When God told me "when you leave the ark the ground will be solid, and there will be a path, MAKE SURE TO FOLLOW IT" there was a huge stress on these words.
I begin to understand. And my reaction is:
God you are soooooo wise!!!!
God had taken me through a time of awareness. He had taken me to all sorts of different places and situations in Bolivia. Just to create awareness. I remember being confused because He never did allow me to build any specific project to aid any of these places in a "real" way.
He had a plan. A perfect plan. He only needed for me to become aware of the need of justice and the church's responsability involved.
God's intention was to take us into a revival, He had taken me through all these things so when the revival started I could guide different groups into different situations and then the REAL action would take place.
But we lost the revival.
Most people did not even notice...I did.
And out of grace and mercy I accepted 40 days of God's wrath.
And out of grace and mercy I accepted 10 months of harsh correction, severe discipline.
Then God took me out of Bolivia...why?
He had dealt with me to a certain point, but He knew I was not ready to face a sleeping church in a dying nation...too much to bear. He had created too much awareness in me, an awareness that demands action from the church. But the church is sleeping...things would be nasty for all. If God had left me in Bolivia I would have gotten deeply hurt.
In Mexico the church is also a sleeping church, but I am not involved and I haven´t been here for more than 12 years...most people don´t even know I am back.
In Mexico we also face poverty and corruption and all that stuff. But the levels do not compare with Bolivia's. And God has placed me in a City and in a neighborhood that is "peaceful and prosperous"
I do not forget what I have seen.
But God knows that I am not in conditions to face a sleeping church in a dying nation.
I continue to have questions. Strong,important questions that need answers before I move out.
Who am I to obey, the pastor or God, if they are walking in opposite directions?
You will tell me: God!...if I am not a memeber of your congregation...
If I were a member of your congregation you would probably say: "Bea, that can´t possibly be God! God would not tell you a thing like that!"
I now know that God knows where I stand, and He is taking deep care off me. He has invested a lot in fixing things in my mind and He doesn´t want all that destroyed.
In due season, but not one minute before, I will be used to face and awaken a sleeping church in a dying nation...wherever that may be.
Let me add one more thing. It is my prayer, a prayer that I whisper timidly, that God may grant me a group of people to carry out this task with.
Not a huge group, it can be small, for:
THERE IS NO DIFFERENCE IN THE SIGHT OF
THE GOD OF HEAVEN TO DELIVER WITH A GREAT
MULTITUDE, OR WITH A SMALL COMPANY.
I MACHABEES 3:18 (catholic Bible)
A small group, with a brave heart, to face and awaken a sleeping church in a dying nation...wherever THAT or THOSE nations may be.
In due season, not one minute before, in due season...when I am strong once more.
God is soooooooo wise, sooooooooo wise...
He is taking care of me!!!
glory be to God!
But I wrote what I wrote and that be it...
I hardly speak of Bolivia now. People expect me to tell all kinds of adventures and things...I am quiet. Too much pain linked to Bolivia.
Not personal pain...I think of "my" people. The people of Bolivia.
When God told me "when you leave the ark the ground will be solid, and there will be a path, MAKE SURE TO FOLLOW IT" there was a huge stress on these words.
I begin to understand. And my reaction is:
God you are soooooo wise!!!!
God had taken me through a time of awareness. He had taken me to all sorts of different places and situations in Bolivia. Just to create awareness. I remember being confused because He never did allow me to build any specific project to aid any of these places in a "real" way.
He had a plan. A perfect plan. He only needed for me to become aware of the need of justice and the church's responsability involved.
God's intention was to take us into a revival, He had taken me through all these things so when the revival started I could guide different groups into different situations and then the REAL action would take place.
But we lost the revival.
Most people did not even notice...I did.
And out of grace and mercy I accepted 40 days of God's wrath.
And out of grace and mercy I accepted 10 months of harsh correction, severe discipline.
Then God took me out of Bolivia...why?
He had dealt with me to a certain point, but He knew I was not ready to face a sleeping church in a dying nation...too much to bear. He had created too much awareness in me, an awareness that demands action from the church. But the church is sleeping...things would be nasty for all. If God had left me in Bolivia I would have gotten deeply hurt.
In Mexico the church is also a sleeping church, but I am not involved and I haven´t been here for more than 12 years...most people don´t even know I am back.
In Mexico we also face poverty and corruption and all that stuff. But the levels do not compare with Bolivia's. And God has placed me in a City and in a neighborhood that is "peaceful and prosperous"
I do not forget what I have seen.
But God knows that I am not in conditions to face a sleeping church in a dying nation.
I continue to have questions. Strong,important questions that need answers before I move out.
Who am I to obey, the pastor or God, if they are walking in opposite directions?
You will tell me: God!...if I am not a memeber of your congregation...
If I were a member of your congregation you would probably say: "Bea, that can´t possibly be God! God would not tell you a thing like that!"
I now know that God knows where I stand, and He is taking deep care off me. He has invested a lot in fixing things in my mind and He doesn´t want all that destroyed.
In due season, but not one minute before, I will be used to face and awaken a sleeping church in a dying nation...wherever that may be.
Let me add one more thing. It is my prayer, a prayer that I whisper timidly, that God may grant me a group of people to carry out this task with.
Not a huge group, it can be small, for:
THERE IS NO DIFFERENCE IN THE SIGHT OF
THE GOD OF HEAVEN TO DELIVER WITH A GREAT
MULTITUDE, OR WITH A SMALL COMPANY.
I MACHABEES 3:18 (catholic Bible)
A small group, with a brave heart, to face and awaken a sleeping church in a dying nation...wherever THAT or THOSE nations may be.
In due season, not one minute before, in due season...when I am strong once more.
God is soooooooo wise, sooooooooo wise...
He is taking care of me!!!
glory be to God!
posted by thisfool @ 9:42 PM
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